I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T

Dear Meagan,

I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T do you know what that means? She got her own house, she got her own car ;)  Right not I know something that you are struggling with is independence. At this point you are realizing that you CAN be independent and do just about everything for yourself but you're kinda scured too.

This weekend you had some blood work that needed to be done. You had me go with you because you didn't know 'how to do it.' Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed going with and getting Brugger's (YUM!). However, when I was there I didn't do a thing for you. In fact, I followed you around.  Going to minor doctors appointments like this is an example of something you can and should do on your own. Can and should, what does that mean?

I think we both know what can means... you are fully capable. But what about should? Why should you do some of these things on your own?  The more things you do independently, the more confidence you will have. When you know you can take care of yourself you no longer depend on other people helping you and your mood is no longer a mirror of their mood. You can set your own mood.  If someone wants to be rude, that is their problem, it doesn't affect you because you are independent and can take care of yourself/ figure out your own feelings.

You SHOULD start doing little tasks for yourself because you CAN. People who go through traumatic life events (such as a brain tumor) naturally become dependent on their loved ones during their trial. The hard part is reaching out for that independence, it's almost like growing up all over again. Keep challenging yourself, and keep reminding yourself, that in order to be happy/confident/awesome, you need to be independent. You can never be in a successful relationship with someone if you DEPEND on that person.

So get out there, do some simple tasks for yourself! Now that you have the energy... start doing some things independently such as: going to doctors apts, running errands, making dinner, exercising, volunteering, etc.

Once you master independence, the next step is interdependence... we will cross that bridge when we get to it :)

Love you schwester!

XOXO,

Brooke